I draw that conclusion from an article that appeared in an education blog of The New York Times that ran shortly after Apple co-founder and CEO Steve Jobs died. Reporter Shannon Doyne asked students “Who is Your Role Model?” and offered Jobs as well as pop singer Kelly Clarkson as examples of people worth emulating.

But when the students were asked to comment, the majority of respondents listed their role models as mom, dad, grandma, grandfather, sister, brother and teachers.

There’s something heartening about that. As a father of two boys, 6 and 4, I certainly hope I am a role model for them and I take that responsibility very seriously. But even though parents can be role models in your formative years and might even continue to be throughout your life, as you get older the people you admire can change. Certainly media can be a big influence as new leaders, artists, entrepreneurs, scholars and professionals come to the fore.

What qualities are important in a role model? And what makes them worthy of the designation? Lots of celebrities are idolized, but how many really deserve the adulation?

And nobody’s perfect. We all can’t be a Gandhi or Mother Teresa. So, perhaps in choosing a role model it’s better to look up to various people who excel at different things. A role model shouldn’t be just someone you hold in high esteem, but a person after whom you would want to pattern your life.

I have always been inspired by very successful people within specific categories. If I wanted to improve on a particular section of my life I would read a book on someone that was successful in that area, whether it would be in business, family, health & fitness, entrepreneurship, or life’s other endeavors.

Qualities such as intelligence, leadership, philanthropy, courage, humility and grace are certainly traits one might want to look for in a role model. Brad Pitt isn’t just a good-looking actor, he’s also interested in helping humanity, as he did by providing new housing for New Orleans residents after Hurricane Katrina. Hillary Clinton showed leadership as a First Lady and went on to become a U.S. Senator and inspired girls and women all over the world as Secretary of State. Muhammad Ali, a beloved athlete once considered to be the most famous person in the world, has used his fame to help other people with Parkinson’s disease by founding the Muhammad Ali Parkinson Center.

So it’s not just being a celebrity that makes a person role model-worthy, but what they do with their celebrity to teach, contribute and improve the human condition. They should inspire greatness in others, but earn their admiration.

And even though it’s nice to know, as a parent, that children still honor their mothers and their fathers, we can’t forget that peers can be role models as well; and it’s important to talk with kids about specific traits they like in the heroes they respect and want to imitate.

A few years ago, Forbes took a look at role models under the age of 18; and along with the names of actors, singers and athletes was Hunter Stewart, then 8 years old. He was a regular little kid with one extraordinary exception: When his mom was diagnosed in 2007 with cancer he did what he knew best — racing trophy karts, off-road trucks that usually run on motocross tracks — to raise awareness for the disease, donate money to the Susan G. Komen for the Cure Foundation, and inspire thousands of others to do the same.

I certainly wouldn’t mind if one of my boys said to me, “When I grow up, I want to be just like him.”

 
My company Breakaway Solutions has helped hundreds of companies and organizations harness the power of the Internet for various reasons. It’s a powerful tool for communication, commerce, education and hundreds of other uses.

But the relative anonymity it can provide to a user means the Internet can be manipulated for devious purposes by users who live on the dark side of the web. And just as a computer has become a modern-age tool for instruction, used by children from a very young age, it can also be used as a tool for destruction by predators looking to connect with vulnerable and innocent children.

Startling Statistics

To illustrate the dangers, let me share some of the statistics I found while writing my book:

■ 48 percent of K-1st graders reported viewing online content that made them feel uncomfortable.

■ 71 percent of teens receive messages from strangers online and 30 percent contemplate meeting them face-to-face.

■ About half of young people have experienced some form of online harassment; one in five children regularly experience cyberbullying.

■ 39 percent of teenagers send or post sexually suggestive messages and 48 percent say they have received such messages.

■ 20 percent of teens have engaged in cyberbullying behaviors.

Learn How to Safeguard

After hearing many horrible stories about children falling victim to online predators, I decided to write a simple book to provide parents with solutions that they can use to empower their children. You don’t have to be a computer expert to safeguard your child against unwanted advances by strangers on the Internet or from peers using social media as a forum for bullying.

I share practical tips, many of which include talking to your children about using the computer responsibly and being aware of risks. Communicating with your child is really the key to making most of these online safeguards work. On the technical side, I recommend installing software that provides parental controls that block certain websites and content, such as pornography. Establish a family email address, rather than allowing your child to have his or her own address. Create strong passwords and change them regularly.

In some cases, the tips I dispense will help protect your computer as well as your child. For example, blocking viruses can keep your computer working properly and by securing your Wi-Fi connection with a password and firewall, you can block unwanted users.

Sites Specifically for Children

I have tried to introduce information that can make computer usage easier and more fun for your child—more kid-friendly, if you will. Several companies have created browsers specifically for younger users. Such browsers use filtering to protect young eyes from unwanted and explicit material. Try using browsers such as Glubble and Buddy Browser, which disable external chat and encourage media sharing and social interaction with family and other people the child already knows.

Facebook has become so pervasive in our society, but leave that to the grownups and introduce your child to social networking sites specifically designed for kids, such as Webkinz or Club Penguin. They offer gaming and a social atmosphere in a kids-only environment with built-in privacy features, like use of an avatar instead of a photo.

These are just a few of the 100 tips that comprise “100 Ways to Keep Your Children Safe Online: The Guide for Parenting in a Digital World.”

Purchase Helps Save the Children

The book is available for purchase on my website, www.johnromano.com/books/ for $9.95. The best part is that by purchasing it you will be helping other children. I am donating 100 percent of the proceeds to the Save the Children organization, which is dedicated to helping children in need.

In writing this book I have tried to impart invaluable information to be used along with a rule of thumb I believe goes along with any parenting task: be involved. Know why, when and how your children are using their computer. Make it a family activity. Know who they are communicating with. All of those things will help you provide online safety for your child and shield him or her from danger.

Most people want to help those in need. If you look around, though, there is a horde of worthy causes competing for your charitable dollar. How do you choose the right charity? By finding one that has personal meaning.

When you spend money, value matters. That’s just as true with charitable donations as it is with buying a new car or a pound of coffee. If you donate to a nonprofit organization that you connect with in some way, then you get more value for your money. You get a greater feeling of satisfaction than if you just drop a dollar in some random bucket at the grocery store checkout.

Each of us has different concerns. One person could have a brother struggling with substance abuse or a parent lost to lung cancer or a child with cerebral palsy. A musician might be upset at the loss of the local school’s music program while a biologist worries about species extinction. All of these concerns are important but these individuals will gain greater satisfaction from donating their time and money to organizations supporting their personal causes than to any other charity.

My charity of choice is Save the Children, a nonprofit organization committed to improving the lives of children around the world who face starvation, abuse and disease. This is a great cause and these children need your help, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the ideal charity for you.

You shouldn’t feel obligated to give to a charity some random guy on the internet supports or to an organization a reality TV star brings up on a talk show or to the cause your friend is involved in. You may care about these organizations but you may not be so passionate about them. Of course you may care about starving children and breast cancer and abused animals and protecting the rainforest and war refugees and landmines… but to feel extremely great about supporting a particular cause, you must support something you are truly passionate about.

Find your focus. Find your passion. You will do more good zeroing in on a single cause, a single organization that matches your outlook in life, than you will tossing pocket change at every person who approaches you with a hand out.